Ok yes I know I have been a little behind on the blogging just had so much going on the past few weeks that I feel like my head is going to blow off. Between work and just life, plus the whole trying to get caught up on all the sleep I lose each week. It has been all just pushing down like crazy.
I seem to have still not found anytime for Jess and me to get some pics done. Just driving me crazy. I feel like all the pics I have are holiday and us just fooling around on dates and around the house. I don't think it will be done anytime in the next month because my June schedule with work is pretty much blocking time for that off. I mean it looks like this:
*Thursdays 7pm-7am
*Saturdays 7am-7pm
*Sundays 7am-7pm
This is every week till June 26. So...yea and Jess works during the week so that doesn't happen. But I will have to say he is going back to working Saturdays at his first job till he gets his call from this new job which the time for that is 7am-3:30pm on a good day most of the time 4pm. So I will get to spend Saturday nights with my baby.
Any that one... Then I had talked about us just taking a little weekend trip somewhere. Well you can see how that is and Jess can't miss work right. We are really trying to save up the money for Destin in August. Plus he has got to fix to parts in his truck before then. Gosh all this money money money. So the trip will just have to wait till later. Even though I think we need something that will help us to get along better some how.
I know every relationship has it time, I am just freaking out that I will push and push to far. I seem to always do that. Plus I think I am just nervous cause Sunday it will have been ONE YEAR that my life has seem to be put in a spin. I am glad things have been changing I just truly cannot believe that a year has passed me by. That the things I thought I would have for the rest of my life have truly changed into the things that I have now. I am just scared something like that will happen again to me and I will break. I am on edge and I know it is not helping anything.
This weekend seemed to be even though I was putting in the Ativan to chill out the nerves that were coming on full time. I don't know how to stop them sometimes and I know I really cannot talk to Jess about them. But I don't know who else there is for me. I just hope that everything just will calm down.
Well I hoped everyone had a good holiday weekend. Post Later
Kenz<3
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